


Granting Absolution

by Telaryn



Category: Leverage
Genre: Angst, Boys Kissing, Episode Tag, Explicit Sexual Content, Hand Jobs, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Shower Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-23
Updated: 2012-10-23
Packaged: 2018-10-15 00:29:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10546946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Telaryn/pseuds/Telaryn
Summary: Prompt & Prompter: After the bloodshed at the warehouse Eliot feels like he can't get clean. (Prompter:sheryden)





	

**Author's Note:**

> Kink: Washing Washing one's partner, body or hair; Shower sex; Hurt/comfort  
> Notes/Warnings: You know the biggest challenge writing porn from inside Nate's head? Once again I can't get him to SHUT UP AND GET DOWN TO BUSINESS!
> 
> I missed my date at [](http://rounds-of-kink.livejournal.com/profile)[**rounds_of_kink**](http://rounds-of-kink.livejournal.com/) , missed the amnesty, and I suspect this prompt it going to be archived out before the next round. So...hope you like it [](http://sheryden.livejournal.com/profile)[**sheryden**](http://sheryden.livejournal.com/)! Spoilers for The Big Bang Job.

Nate had no way of knowing how long the shower had been running; the bathroom was so filled with steam it was difficult to see at first. Eliot was a shadow behind the curtain, huddled on the floor of the tub as water from the shower sprayed around him.

Nate had agreed with him that the others didn’t need to know what had happened in the warehouse. He’d seen the look in his eyes when Eliot had bent down to pick up the abandoned pistol, and when he’d ordered Nate to safety. He’d listened to the gunfire as he’d fled with the Italian in tow, trying to calculate precisely how impossible the odds were, and he’d seen the explosions in his rear view mirror as they’d driven to the airport to try and stop Moreau from leaving the country.

He’d also been stunned – as well as relieved – when Eliot had burst into the hangar heading for Moreau with murder in his heart. Probably the only person more stunned to see Eliot alive and unharmed in that moment than Nate was Moreau himself.

_Unharmed being a relative term._ Whether he talked about it or not, the amount of death he’d left in his wake was something Eliot was going to have to deal with, and Nate was determined he wasn’t going to have to deal with it alone.

“Eliot…” Chest tight with worry, Nate pulled the curtain back – flinching as burning drops of water struck him. “Eliot, look at me.” The hitter’s skin was tinged with red from the heat of the shower, and he didn’t seem to be aware of Nate at all.

After a long moment, Nate crouched at the edge of the tub and reached out to lay his hand on Eliot’s arm. The physical contact jolted him, pulling Eliot back from whatever place deep in his soul he’d retreated to. Reddened eyes met Nate’s through the spray. “’m so cold.” The words were barely audible over the hiss of the shower. “I can’t get on top of it.”

Nate swore under his breath. Eliot had to be completely numb inside for the temperature of the water not to have registered at all. He blew out a quiet breath. “Do you trust me?” He squeezed Eliot’s arm, keeping his attention. When Eliot didn’t argue or pull away Nate said, “Give me a minute and we’ll get you sorted out.”

Pushing back to his feet, he stripped off his shirt and tossed it aside. The rest of his clothes quickly followed suit, and in less than a minute he was climbing in the shower behind Eliot.

The first thing he did was reach across and adjust the temperature of the water down a fraction of a turn. Eliot flinched, hissing as the change in temperature registered in his brain. Murmuring an apology, Nate settled back on his heels.

_”I’ll never be clean of it._

The strands of Eliot’s hair were so water soaked they felt like silk sliding between his fingers. Nate took his time with the shampoo – every move he made calm, control and deliberate. Words swirled through his mind as he worked, things he could say – things he probably should say to let Eliot know he wasn’t alone, that somebody else saw…somebody else cared about what he was going through.

In the end he stayed quiet, trusting his hands to speak for him. Gradually some of the tension in Eliot’s neck and shoulders began to ease, and he started to lean almost instinctively into Nate. Cupping his hands, Nate let them fill with water, then let the water fall across Eliot’s scalp. Carding his fingers through the strands of hair, he worked as much residual soap out as he could, then calmly repeated the process.

_How many?_ Nate knew Eliot would tell him if he asked, but he also wasn’t sure he could bear knowing. _I shouldn’t have let you._ Even if it had meant his own life in the end, Nate wasn’t sure the price Eliot was currently paying was worth it.

“I don’t deserve you.” The words finally slipped out as he began working soap into the muscles of Eliot’s shoulders and back. “I keep wondering what you see in me, why you stay, why you’ve decided I’m worth your loyalty, your protection…you’re like this amazing gift that I’m half sure is going to get taken away once God realizes he’s made a mistake giving you to me in the first place.”

His hands hesitated briefly as he realized Eliot’s shoulders were shaking with quiet sobs. “You saved my life,” he went on, cupping his hands and letting them fill with water again. “I’ll never be able to repay you for that.” He let the water fall once more, sluicing the suds away.

After working up a fresh lather this time, he splayed his fingers and leaned in slightly as he ran his hands down the slope of Eliot’s back – closing his eyes and memorizing the feel of each bone and muscle and scar. “I can’t do this without you, Eliot. I won’t.” His fingers caught briefly in the ridges of the hitter’s ribcage before skimming across the softer skin of his sides.

Hands covered his, stopping him. “You don’t have to do this, Nate.” Eliot’s voice was thick with so much grief Nate felt something break deep inside his own chest. He was quiet for a moment, then gently pulled free and resumed his ministrations.

“I know,” he said, as his hands worked the muscles along Eliot’s hips, feeling the roughness of a twisting scar under his right palm. _You’ve never told me about this one._ The thought was idle, fleeting – Eliot didn’t like talking about the damage he’d taken over the years under the best of circumstances. _Which these definitely are not._

The hitter drew in a deep, shuddering breath. “I made some calls,” he said, his voice still rough. “We don’t need to worry about this coming back on us.”

Nate shifted his position so that he was seated behind Eliot now, his legs bracketing the younger man’s thighs. “I figured,” he said. _Sun hot, water wet, Eliot has my back._ The sing-song litany in his mind was just enough of an absurd counter-point to the scene that he almost laughed. It was true though – he couldn’t remember the first time the realization had come to him, but he’d reminded himself of it literally thousands of times since.

He gathered more water, washing away the suds he’d spread across hips and thighs. “How’re you feeling?”

Another deep, shuddering sigh shivered across Eliot’s body, and this time Nate could see more of the impossible tension easing. “Better,” the hitter admitted. “More…in control.”

“Good.” Nate was reaching for the soap when Eliot half-turned, meeting his eyes. Some of the pain was gone, but there was so much desperate heat in its wake that Nate froze – unsure what his next move needed to be.

“I don’t want to be by myself tonight.”

He could tell it had cost Eliot a great deal just to say the words, but fortunately he’d already gotten there and settled into the idea. “I’m not going anywhere, Eliot. Trust me.”

It seemed to take a moment for the words to fully sink in, then Eliot turned even more, so they were almost squared off with each other. “You said you wonder why I stay?” He reached out and cupped his hand at the back of Nate’s head, fingers tangling in the wet curls. “I could ask you the same question, you know.” Now it was his turn to come up on his knees, and Nate saw that he wasn’t the only one physically reacting to their proximity and the raw emotion that had been unleashed between them. “You’re a good man. A son of a bitch sometimes, but you’re still basically a decent human being. Why…” He swallowed hard, the moment of honesty broken suddenly – but Nate could still hear the rest of his question as clearly as if Eliot had spoken it out loud.

_Why don’t you push me away?_

“I need you in my life,” Nate said. “No, wait,” he said quickly as Eliot opened his mouth to respond, “let me finish. I need you in my life because you don’t just protect me from outside threats.” He pressed his palm flat to Eliot’s chest, feeling his heart beating fast and hard just below the surface. “You protect me from myself. We all talk about me being the ‘honest man’, but Eliot I’ve got as much potential in me to be a monster as you do.” He laughed bitterly, glad now that the shower spray could hide the tears on his cheeks. “I’m just a different flavor, don’t you get that?”

“Don’t…” Eliot leaned in and kissed him. It was gentle, almost hesitant. “Don’t do that.” Their eyes met, and Nate had half a heartbeat to wonder if he would ever be worthy of the depth of emotion he saw in the man now half-crouched over him, urging him back against the surface of the tub. Then before he could catch his breath Eliot was kissing him again – open mouthed this time, desperate and hungry, his tongue teasing out lines of heat that seemed to Nate to go straight to his cock.  
“I don’t want to think anymore,” Eliot said once he finally let Nate up for air. He maneuvered himself until they were lying next to each other, then reached down and wrapped his fingers around Nate’s shaft. Nate shuddered, his hips flexing involuntarily as Eliot stroked him. “And I definitely don’t want to talk.”

“I…I can live with that,” Nate gasped, shivering uncontrollably as Eliot’s fingers found a particularly sensitive nerve cluster and teased at it. “Eliot…”

“Easy…” His hands became more sure of themselves as they moved across Nate’s body, seeking out every spot he’d uncovered in the time they’d been together, every way he knew Nate liked to be touched. He ducked his head in close to the curve of Nate’s throat. “Let me do this…” The plea was little more than a warm breath against Nate’s skin as the water fell around them.

Nate pulled him in close then, losing himself in the reality of their bodies pressed together – the incredible sensations Eliot was drawing out of him. _I could have lost you._ It was the last coherent thought he managed before his muscles seized, and he came in a warm, thick spill over Eliot’s fist. Nate bit hard into the muscle of Eliot’s shoulder, trying to muffle his cries.

“I’ve got you.” Eliot’s voice was calm, and his movements were once again steady as he held Nate through the aftershocks of his orgasm. “I’m right here. I'm not going anywhere."


End file.
